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Comments
I have numerous friends with different levels of this disabilitating condition and in every case each of the relationships are very intuned with their partners conditions and they are very keen about the knowing whether physical activity is not always possible with their partner. Very disappointed you be this ignorant to make this a vital part of the story and never reveal the said condtion only using vagueness for a very real critical piece of information.
I often think about how I'd love to read a story on here in the BDSM category where the sub was chronically ill and how that'd change the play. I'd love to read the steps the Dom would take to make BDSM accessible for the sub while still being mindful of her symptoms and limitations, which can be a broad, varied, long, and constantly changing list. It'd be fascinating to read the tricks and work arounds the Dom would use to still accommodate the sub's desires while constantly having to keep an eye on her health and limits considering that the chronically ill often push themselves harder than they should in every day life and pay for it later with pain, exhaustion, and/or an increase in symptoms of their illness. I've considered pitching this idea one of my favorite authors here but she's in the middle of a long series right now. Anyway, this story is the closest I've come to finding something like that here and it was lovely. Usually what I come across that includes disability, especially in Romance, are stories where a person is either blind or deaf, or a spouse or parent finding love again after cancer has taken their spouse/child. While those are great, they don't necessarily encompass the often shifting landscape of living with many neurological or rare diseases or even of living with cancer (rather than being the widow/widower). Representation matters and it was great to come across a story where the person has a symptom like mine. Thank you.
And here's my comment on that story:
I loved this! I, too, suffer from severe neuropathy due to an autoimmune disease of the central nervous system. Thankfully, it's mostly under control right now thanks to Pregabalin. Before that I was on Gabapentin for years until I was eventually on the max dose and it no longer had the desired effect. I dread the day Pregabalin no longer helps me. While reading, I kept wondering why she didn't take any meds. Life was pretty unbearable before them, for me. I chose to assume that she tried them and they didn't work for her or she eventually became immune to them. I remember what it was like to not be able to be touched because the pain was too intense. That pins and needles, itchy, tingly feeling of being on fire is miserable. I was nodding my head when you mentioned tight constant pressure not being as bad as loose touching. It reminded me of how I'd lay in bed and it'd hurt to lay down but eventually I'd get used to it. The real torture came from someone trying to put a bed sheet over me. Fuck no. The pain of a thin little bed sheet was unbearable. When I read that I kept thinking, but being underwater helps. I'd spend entire days in the bathtub, sometimes even sleeping in it, just so the pain would be lessened, to have just an hour or two where I didn't want to scream. I preferred warm or hot water over cooler water though. I always felt like I was on fire so the temperature change with cool water was uncomfortable. Anyway, while I was thinking about how much being submerged helps, you introduced a pool not a page later. Really great work on accurately describing life with neuropathy and how painful and isolating it can be.
I often think about how I'd love to read a story on here in the BDSM category where the sub was chronically ill and how that'd change the play. I'd love to read the steps the Dom would take to make BDSM accessible for the sub while still being mindful of her symptoms and limitations, which can be a broad, varied, long, and constantly changing list. It'd be fascinating to read the tricks and work arounds the Dom would use to still accommodate the sub's desires while constantly having to keep an eye on her health and limits considering that the chronically ill often push themselves harder than they should in every day life and pay for it later with pain, exhaustion, and/or an increase in symptoms of their illness. I've considered pitching this idea to one of my favorite authors here but she's in the middle of a long series right now. Anyway, this story is the closest I've come to finding something like that here and it was lovely. Usually what I come across that includes disability, especially in Romance, are stories where a person is either blind or deaf, or a spouse or parent finding love again after cancer has taken their spouse/child. While those are great, they don't necessarily encompass the often shifting landscape of living with many neurological or rare diseases or even of living with cancer (rather than being the widow/widower). Representation matters and it was great to come across a story where I share a symptom with one of the characters. Thank you.